I am the Messenger.

Remember when I was treading into the unknown waters of reading multiple books at one time? I was a bit nervous about how that was going to work out for me. Well it turns out that I am not satisfied with just having one or even two novels with bookmarks sitting on my table. There are officially three. The first reason is that I can't bring myself to read the 'vampire smut' books in public. The second reason is that it has been a few weeks since I have picked up "The Happiness Project." It was supposed to be my in-between-novels book. Instead I'm about 50 pages from the end, with no motivation to finish. But certain recent developments have made it clear that I need to be inspired all over again to pursue my happiness resolutions.

Earlier today I was feeling stressed about something and I just couldn't figure out what was tugging at the back of my mind. Finally I realized it hit me, my unchecked to-do list. Lately I have been causing myself stress by procrastinating until the last possible minute. Take last week for instance. Instead of buying my brother's birthday present earlier in the week when I was at the mall, I decided to wait until a half hour before dinner. This meant that I had to walk the entire length of the mall in a pair of heels that after a long day at work were killing my ankles.

I found it so hilarious that on the way to the mall that day I just so happened to stumble upon the 5:19 funny on a local radio station. The comedian was talking about traffic, and I felt like this punch line summed up my constant state of rushing:

"The freeways are for people like me, who have so poorly planned their lives, they are in a constant seizure to get to where they should have been thirty minutes ago."

The truth is that I made it on time for dinner that night, even before the birthday boy. So why am I making a big deal out of this particular event? Mostly because I haven't been following my Secrets of Happiness Commandments very well. Specifically number 15. Check off things from your to-do list. I've been failing at this one beautifully. Especially when it comes to all things theatre related. I don't know why, but lately it has been feeling an awful lot like homework to create the press releases, call newspapers for ad quotes, et cetera....et cetera. I don't know why but I put it off and put it off until I can't put it off a moment longer. I really need to work on this number 15. And get back to being inspired by "The Happiness Project."

Update Book 32: I am the Messenger by Markus Zusak

I do believe that I may have found myself a favorite author. Zusak also wrote #18 of the year "The Book Thief." Which, the further away I get from it the more convinced I am that it may also be my favorite book (and also a book I would openly recommend.) "I am the Messenger," is not as brutally emotional as "The Book Thief," but I love the style in which Zusak crafts a story. His characters are enthralling, his vocabulary is absorbing, and every word he uses captivates me as a reader. Zusak has managed to create novels where one moment you are laughing out loud and the next you are sobbing. After reading his books, you really feel like you lived the life of the main character. The only thing I can not understand is why all of his books are in the Young-Adult section. Not only are they as riveting as I've said, but they are also packed with mature content. My hope is that this doesn't dissuade people from picking them up.

"I am the Messenger," is about Ed, a completely mediocre man of 19 years. Ed is going nowhere in life until he stops a bank robber and begins receiving playing cards with addresses on them. The people who live at these addresses need some sort of help. Ed becomes the 'messenger.'

I'll admit that at first, I didn't understand the ending. It is one of those ambiguous figure-it-out-for-yourself conclusions. The more I pondered the ending, the more enthralled I became with it. I realize a lot of people will finish this book not interpret it the way that I did (isn't that one of the beauties of books?) and some may even think the author got lazy and ended abruptly. I think the author's intent was to make readers contemplate their own lives, mediocre of otherwise. This is a book that I will think back on often.

As always here are a few passages that I enjoyed that probably make little or no sense when out of context:

"I didn't know words could be so heavy."

"Sometimes people are beautiful.

Not in looks.

Not in what they say.

Just in what they are."

"This isn't about words.

It's about glowing lights and small things that are big."